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Virgil Van Dijk Puts In Written Request
Monday, 10th Jul 2017 22:52

Virgil Van Dijk has handed in a written transfer request to Les Reed on the first day of the team's trip to Austria for pre season training.

Virgil Van Dijk has found it neccessary to hand in a written request to Les Reed to transfer to a different room in the team's hotel.

Van Dijk was dismayed to find himself in a room overlooking the nearby Alps when he had set his heart on one that had a view of the Pool.

Several cryptic pictures appeared on his twitter account of him looking forlornly out of a hotel window at the swimming pool below, clutching a bar of Toblerone and an Echo & The Bunnymen album.

Another picture showed him walking across the grounds of the hotel barefoot, suggesting that his shoes may already be in Liverpool.

The Liverpool Echo was the first to pick up on the story running a story about Van Dijk's top ten favourite Bunnymen tracks claiming that Rescue from the 1980 Album crocodiles was his top pick.

They also suggested that the Player would be willing to force the move through using some Hilton Honours Points he had acrued on International duty with Holland.

A Professional Scouser who would only give his name as "Scally Quinn" said.

"A mate of ime is in the Hotel business and the word is that this is a done deal, they have already turned the sheets over in his new room and put Evian in the mini bar"

However a source close to Southampton FC said.

"This has enraged the club who were hoping that he would stay in the Alp view room for at least another night and hopefully the five remaining nights of the team's stay, they feel that this is a blatant tapping up of a guest by the Hilton Group and intend to report them to the Hoteliers Association in the morning"

Saints Director of football Les Reed stated.

"Virgil Van Dijk was happy to check into an Alp view room for six nights only a few hours ago, we have no intention of letting any of our players move to another room, unless it s in the best interests of the club, ie if they offer a huge discount and perhaps throw in a few free full Alpen breakfasts"

" He has been appointed Team Swimming Pool monitor for the trip, a very important role in the squad and one that should not be taken lightly."

An unamed member of the Saints squad commented.

" The problem with breaking into the first team squad at such an early age is that half of our squad havent learn't to swim yet, Virgil is vital to this squad, especially when around water"

NB As in most Virgil Van Dijk transfer stories, any resemblance to the truth is purely coincidental.

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Photo: Action Images

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redandwhitesupporter added 23:03 - Jul 10
Haha always good to see some light hearted fun surrounding the situation and nice click bait title to boot as well.

steve73 added 23:30 - Jul 10
Started swearing when I read the headline and got a stiff rebuke from the wife. When I realised it was a comedy piece I got even more annoyed. I'm laughing now I've calmed down but don't do it again!

saintpp added 00:58 - Jul 11
You arseholes i nearly choked on my coffee when i saw the headline!

BuyEastleighFC4aBtea added 01:02 - Jul 11
I realize this is supposed to be lighthearted artical but it is in fact such a moronic statement it will only serve to add fuel on a fire. The stupidity of it all is astonishing I am sure other press outlets will pick up this. Bring added doubt in the minds of some Saints supporters that the board can handle pressure of keeping our best players happy. Faith in them is thin on the ground and will continue that way until they manage to have window where we only add world class players to the team and not lose any players like VVD.

Singapore_Saint added 03:01 - Jul 11
Good laugh but I hope we haven't put any ideas into VVD's head!

Saintsincanada added 03:52 - Jul 11
Throw him another blanket and some Gouda cheese and he will be fine 😀

SaintPaulVW added 07:22 - Jul 11
Just spat my cornflakes across the room, you bu66ers.

Love it!

SanMarco added 07:38 - Jul 11
Last time you did a 'comedy' VVD piece the brown stuff hit the fan that very day - hopefully no repeat today. This will be even less funny if Les DOES get a letter today....

darthvader added 10:18 - Jul 11
Ur a bafoon. I called him all c.Unts under the sun then and then changed it to you .

SaintBrock added 18:56 - Jul 11
OoH! You are a tease Nicky.

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