Spurs Certain To Sign Danny Ings After Harry Kane Damages Toe Nail.
Friday, 29th Jan 2021 10:52
Within seconds of Harry Kane limping out of Tottenham Hotspur's defeat at home to Liverpool, Spurs fans were taking to social media to demand the signing of Southampton's Danny Ings and within the hour it was being claimed as a done deal.
Thursday evening was meant to be the night that Tottenham Hotspur confirmed their Premier League title credentials by slaughtering out of form Liverpool, a win that would see them soar to 4th in the table and ready to take on the Manchester clubs for the title run in.
But if their dreams of being the nations top club were dashed, then they had another shock as they didn't even end the evening as London's top club in the table, West Ham United taking that accolade as the week's fixtures ended.
But there was even more bad news for the Tottenham faithful, Harry Kane did not re appear in the second half after suffering not one but two toe nail injuries, if they had both been on the same foot then the England striker would have surely soldiered on, after all he only needs one big toe fit in order to poke the ball over the line from two yards, but with both being ruled too painful to continue he was forced to accept that his night was over and wrap them both up in some frozen peas, Spurs being in around £975 million of debt at the moment, finding it cheaper to treat injuries with frozen Peas rather than use expensive Ice.
This makes it all the more strange that Tottenham supporters immediately took to social media demanding the signing of Danny Ings in the next 24 hours, the numbers were so great that within a short space of time some very important media outlets were tipping this to be a done deal.
In the Express none other than former Aston Villa frontman Gabby Agbonlahor believed that Spurs should make their move in the final few days of the window:
"[Harry] Kane could play as a number 10, behind Ings or vice-versa to be honest they can both play there.
"I just think it would take Spurs to the next level, they’re missing that extra striker with top, top quality.
"I do like Vinicius but I think if you get Danny Ings you’re making a statement and he could be the reason they go on and finish in the top four this season."
Gabby was very surprised to get the call from the Express, since retiring from football he has been working as a supervisor in the Aston Villa programme sales department and is currently furloughed.
It is believed that the Express had meant to phone Gabby Logan a credible sports pundit, but got their Gabby's mixed up being next to each other in the phone book, an easy mistake to make.
I am sure there are other media outlets dragging up Ex professional footballers to give bland comments, but this is my favourite.
Anyway when you are looking for the headline "Danny Ings tipped to join Spurs" you need to have someone actually tip him to do so and a retired Aston Villa player with no connections to either Spurs or Saints and for that matter no other obvious connection to the player himself is as good a source as any.
Twitter was full of delirious Spurs fans or did i mean deluded ? such gems as "Get it done Levy" "unbelievable" "We will definitely win the League and be on a par with Huddersfield now" started to appear on twitter and other social media sites, they may have been on tic tok but being over 24 I don't really know what that is.
The sad part of the story is that Harry Kane once the golden boy of White Hart Lane, limped out of the Tottenham Hotspur Stadium quietly through a back door, when asked by the waiting media pack about his toe nails, clearly rattled by the rumours that he was about to be usurped as King Of Tottenham after walking past Daniel Levy's office, only to see the Spurs CEO slitting open a sofa with a knife to try and get some loose change, he tetchily replied;
"Its not my toe nails its my ankles don't you know England's European Championship hopes are now hanging by a thread, show me some respect you leeches, it wasn't Danny Ings who saved Gareth Southgate's job in 2018 was it, I'm only going to be out for two games for Christ's sake"
So Saints supporters should brace themselves for the usual bombardment of Spurs friendly media, agents and half of Milton Keynes going ballistic on Social Media.
Winner of the competition for the first sighting of Danny Ings in North London was a Mr Jason Cundy of Hoxton who claims to have spotted the at the moment Saints striker alighting a tube at Seven Sisters station and walking briskly down Tottenham High Road in the direction of the Tottenham Hotspur Stadium at 11.24pm on Thursday night.
The Spot Dele Alli competition is still running as there has been no winner so far.
Photo: Action Images
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Letters from Wiltshire #33 by wessex_exile
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Letters from Wiltshire #32 by wessex_exile
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