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Comment | 100 and out – Preview
at 14:37:38
Another great piece of writing Clive, and a fitting tribute to Cookie. I know I'm not alone in being sad at seeing him go. He's such a consummate pro, no nonsense, hard AF, someone whose timing and positioning are spot-on, very rarely makes a mistake and also chips in with the odd goal.
Would have loved us to keep him for another season, key player in getting us out of the mire on a fair few occasions.
A proper player, never hid, left it all on the pitch. He certainly kept his side of the bargain unlike some of the clowns we've had over the the years.
All the best Cookie, thanks for the last 3 seasons, it's been a pleasure to have you representing our club - you'll be missed.
As a parting task, maybe someone could ask him who he thinks is a worthy successor to don the "get out of my 'ucking pub" hat? I guess Jimmy D would be the obvious choice. |
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Comment | Cifuentes placed on garden leave as reign that promised so much unravels
at 14:35:23
Another excellent, insightful but ultimately damning analysis - your reports, as always are much "enjoyed" and appreciated Clive.
What a sh1tshow, the habitual self-harmer of a club doing the only thing it does consistently well, hurting itself and the one constant - its long suffering support base.
I'm seriously considering a break next season and going to watch Hanwell Town instead, good selection of ales, decent facilities, players who play for the love of the game and a board who have a plan.
Enjoy the summer folks! |
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Comment | Cook rolls back the years as QPR stand firm for first clean sheet – Report
at 13:52:01
Wonderful stuff again Clive, don't know how you keep doing it - but very grateful that you do. That Parker/Burnley analysis had me laughing out loud - absolutely brutal mate, and bang on the money. From his interviews SP strikes me as a complete joy vacuum, and one that he has successfully managed to convey onto the pitch by moulding his expensive charges into a footballing manifestation of himself, a team set-up bore the ars.e off every hapless bstard who has the misfortune to witness it.
A very good point on the road but like many I'm really worried about our options up front. |
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Comment | Frey ties up cliffhanger on home debut – Report
at 11:03:34
Unfortunately couldn't make the game so had to make do with listening in. The match report goes a long way to compensate for my missing out on what sounded a potty Championship fixture.
As per, more magnificence from Mr W. What a talented b*gger he is - some of those lines/jokes/prose - always a superb read. The "rakes" and "Jennifer Lawrence" did me. Where does he get these from?
I don't know how some of our support, (and Clive, given the effort he puts in) have kept going given how pony we've been at times this season, but it feels like their unwavering support is finally being rewarded. Granted it's early days but it feels like change is in the air. I love what Marti is doing and have complete faith in him to turn this sh*t-show around.
U R's |
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Comment | You’re going to need a bigger boat – Report
at 17:08:55
Fantastic write-up Clive - some absolute pearlers in there, good laughs in a grim assessment of the sh. it show we've become.
To some extent I feel for GA but he must have had some idea of what he was walking into.
I thought it was at best a questionable decision to appoint him in the first place and nothing I've seen to date has changed my mind.
He was a great player for us but I just cannot listen to his interviews - just spouts a cocktail of negativity, positivity, denials, Brentisms, serial contradictions, cliches, and other assorted Ron Manager nonsense. I can't get my head around his strategy on, or off the field, what the players make of it - God only knows what his team talks are like. I really want him to succeed but I'm expecting this to end in tears, he just seems out of his depth. |
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Comment | What are we watching tonight? — Preview
at 10:55:29
Another brilliant piece Clive - you never fail to give me a laugh, and for that I doff the old titfer.
You mention Mark Robins. What a stellar job he’s done. Coventry we’re seemingly adrift earlier in the season, ground problems and fixture congestion it looked like they were in real trouble. I know they put the nail in the coffin for us all those years ago but I would love to see them get promoted just as a reward for Robins amazing work, he seems like a top guy and a has consistently performed under very difficult circumstances.
Here’s to a positive outcome today. |
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Comment | Choose the form of the destructor — Report
at 13:55:51
What a depressing read.
Thanks for the report Clive, dunno how you and those other hardy souls keep going TBH. I used to do quite a few away days when I was single, we went with the expectation that a win was not an impossibility, but this reads like the death throws and we're just waiting for the priest to show up to shout the last rites.
As always though with Clives reports, there's the odd silver lined cloud, on this occasion:
What has happened to RD:
"Whenever Hugill pulled onto Dickie it was like watching a lion try to fnuck a sheep" & " to now where he looks like a bloke who’s spent a month in the boot of a car at the airport." - absolute gold - what images these conjore. |
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Comment | Going, going… - Report
at 14:25:50
Funny as fcuk, that report - bravo Clive.
Special mention for this though, perfectly sums it up....
.... Middlesbrough, who started laying waste to the Championship at almost the exact moment Queens Park Rangers began curling this seemingly never-ending steamer into the division’s U-bend.
It's making me laugh - again. |
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Comment | The Dykes debate - Preview
at 10:20:56
We don’t play to Dykes’ strengths. He’s limited but comparing him to Washington - contributes way more than CW did. Selling him now with no replacement would be madness. I think with the right service he’d get more.
My main frustration is with with Ilias. No doubt he’s a talented lad but he piss-balls around, over complicates and get caught out once the oppo crowd him out. His decision making is poor and if he’s to be a top grade player he needs to learn when to make that pass rather then hang on to the ball. He’s certainly got ability but ffs release the ball when you can do damage. I would also like to see him run at speed into the penalty area with the ball, similar with Williock, why are we so reluctant to do that? |
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Comment | The Dykes debate - Preview
at 10:20:52
We don’t play to Dykes’ strengths. He’s limited but comparing him to Washington - contributes way more than CW did. Selling him now with no replacement would be madness. I think with the right service he’d get more.
My main frustration is with with Ilias. No doubt he’s a talented lad but he piss-balls around, over complicates and get caught out once the oppo crowd him out. His decision making is poor and if he’s to be a top grade player he needs to learn when to make that pass rather then hang on to the ball. He’s certainly got ability but ffs release the ball when you can do damage. I would also like to see him run at speed into the penalty area with the ball, similar with Williock, why are we so reluctant to do that? |
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Comment | About Friday - Report
at 20:44:38
Smashed it out of the park again Clive, a fitting report for a thoroughly enjoyable game under the floodlights at LR.
Cheers for all you do mate, your dedication is amazing. |
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Comment | Dickie bounces Rangers back off the canvas - Report
at 15:22:41
Clive smashes it again, some absolute corkers in there.
Have to disagree with your "4 " for Naismith, well harsh - a nailed on 8 if ever there was one.
As for Jones, absolute weapons grade dinlow. Stone Island how old is he? I wasn't at the game but his behavior on TV was embarassing. I do hope he's not been allowed to breed. |
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Comment | Imagine if we won - Report
at 20:49:54
Superb report Clive, some of it had me laughing out loud, emotional stuff - wifey doesn’t understand of course.
The Dike incident was sickening, just don’t understand how that wasn’t a straight red. He knew exactly what he was doing. That could have been really, really nasty. It’s soccer right, not American Football - ‘kin disgraceful.
A great result and a fitting report.
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Comment | This is getting serious — Signing
at 22:06:50
Great write up, thanks Clive.
This is the one I really wanted us to nail, great work by the club. Thought this would go to the wire, what a great close season.
I think I’m going to go full on Sally Albright if I’m being honest.
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Comment | QPR have their Field day — Signing
at 19:07:03
Excellent bit of business securing him. Okay, he’s had his injury problems but as you said there’s no way he’d be at QPR if he had hadn’t a bit of history.
I’m really pleased to see him sign, loads of potential, great physique, good technique and seems a genuinely likeable character. The right sort.
Welcome Sam! |
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Comment | Be social out there — Preview
at 09:12:15
Clive. That makes for some pretty disturbing, but not unsurprising reading. Problem is, as you said you have to have a presence out there it’s just not optional given your profession, so you’re easy pickings for some moron.
I’m in no position to offer advice about dealing with this sh1t - my social media profile couldn’t be much lower, but I will say please don’t give it up, keep on doing what you’re doing mate as the stuff on this site is head and shoulders above anything else out there. Don’t let it get to you, you know there’s a bunch of people out there that support and appreciate what you do.
On a lighter note, regarding you losing your sh1t. I was sat behind you in SAR a couple of seasons ago (can’t remember the oppo was a cup game - of course we lost). Didn’t realise it was you until you turned around, granted there was a bit of choice ranting, but it was amusing, have you thought about taking up commentary? Mmm, maybe not then.
Anyway keep on doing your stuff, and f.c.uk the detractors.
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Comment | Resurgent Rangers finally have their Field day — Report
at 09:51:41
Haha what a great report (again) thank you Clive. Some real lols in there which had my wife asking “what was so funny?†- ordinarily I don’t like to laugh. I told her she wouldn’t understand.
I am growing a little concerned about my Brentford supporting neighbour who normally can’t stop sending me text messages when we play them, he’s been silent since their first goal Wednesday. His house backs onto mine and I was thinking of going up to my loft room doors , texting him to look up to my loft while I stand there with my arse bared. What do you think?
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Comment | The Ale Faurlin interview — part two
at 22:11:45
Thanks Clive, what a great interview. He seems a really warm, sensitive, gentle character. I loved watching him as a player - he was quite majestic. Such a shame he was so unlucky with the injuries he suffered.
I remember seeing him on the platform at White City one day and doing a double-take. Didn't have the nerve to say hello, never sure as to how some people react - wish I' had now after reading that, I don't think he'd have minded.
Thanks for the memories Ale, and all the best for the future.
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Comment | QPR's comeback kids stick four through Stoke - Report
at 13:49:01
Wasn't at the game but listened to the comms, at 2 down I really did fear the worst - heart sank with the 2 going in. Mentally I'd given up and the 3 points were heading away from LR.
WTF do I know? Nowt, unlike Clive who can certainly summarize the game in the most entertaining way. It's almost as good as being there in person.
Great report and thanks to all the LFW team for their top work.
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