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In The Garden 12:16 - May 27 with 384 viewsSaintNick

I thought I'd dug up an unknown species of dinosaur in my back garden.
Excitedly I phoned the Natural History Museum, but it turned out to be a fossil arm ....

Satisfying The Bloodlust Of The Masses In Peacetime

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In The Garden on 12:30 - May 27 with 371 viewsTimSaint

The inventor of the sexual innuendo sadly passed away this morning.
His wife is taking it really hard.

I heard that glass coffins are the new craze for funerals, but I wonder if they will become popular ?
Remains to be seen.

Astronomers got tired of watching the moon go round the earth for 24 hours, so they decided to call it a day.

I just spent £1,000 on a reincarnation seminar.
I thought what the heck, you only live once.

A mate went to a new fetish restaurant last night.
He go toed in the hole.

Shop assistant fought off armed robber with a labelling gun.
Police now hunting for a man with a price on his head.

Scientists have invented artificial vocal cords.
The results speak for themselves.

Going to start a dildo repair service after lockdown.
I'm calling it 'InspectHerGadget'.

TimSaint

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In The Garden on 18:26 - May 27 with 286 viewshedgeend61

A priest, a Rabbit and a Minister walk into a bar.
The barman asks the Rabbit, "What do you want?"
The Rabbit replied, "I don't know, I'm only here because of autocorrect"

A guy from the RSPCA knocked on my door this morning.He said, "We've had a complaint that you've been overfeeding your cat.
Apparently it weighs the best part of 4 stone.
"I said, "It's not a cat."
"Well what the fu*k is it then" he asked
I said" It's a hamster".
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